“An Open letter to the Hindu Parents”
Dear Brothers and Sisters,
I am a father of two children. My wife and I raised them in a country which is inhabited by 99.90% Christians. Our daughter was just 9 months old when we went to that country with a job. Our son was born there. They went to school run by Roman Catholic Church, went to Sunday school, said Christian Prayers in their school. There were only two other Hindu families who practised our religion earnestly.
Except occasional visit to India in 25 years, none of them had much exposure to our culture and spirituality. My wife and I tried our best to keep the fundamental of our roots and to imbibe it into the mind, heart and brain of our children. We sat down with them, for an hour every evening and 2 hours on Saturday teaching them Devotional songs, our scriptures explain them spirituality, Hindu culture and even many history of our ancestors. We had to take an extra care to make sure that they follow the right direction, so that they can have a ‘Good ethical life’.
There was much impediment, stumbling blocks for their proper upbringing in the form of not having any Hindu place of worship, totally alien cultural environment, lots of social evils like Drug abuse of many kinds. But, we fought with all impediment, sacrificed our own recreations. We were young too and had our desire to enjoy many things. But we chose our way of enjoyment very carefully and never ever ventured for anything which can send a wrong signal to our children.
The TV shows in that country showed “Bold and Beautiful’, we never watched. You know why?? Because those shows were vulgar and a decent people should not watch and we also did not want our children to follow the examples set in those shows. We selected the films produced in Bollywood very carefully and sat with our children to enjoy that. We never ever wanted them to know that there should be two set of rules, one for the parents and one for the children. We never attended a party where children were not allowed (there were many always goes on in this part of the world). There were many other areas that we carefully cultivated at the cost of our own enjoyment that many young parents will like to do.
Do you know why we did all these?? We realised that, as parents, it is not only our duty to make sure that they have a full belly, much money in the bank saved for them, jewellery in the bank vault, etc etc that most do. Yes, we spent money for their education but never given one extra dollar that they really do not need.
Our both children are well educated, well settled, happily married and actually raising up their own children almost in the same manner that were adopted for them when they were very young and in their tender age. We are not at all worried for our children, not even for our Grand children, because, we know those little kids are in very good hand.
Because they are settled and happy, my wife and I could have taken early retirement and with little money that we saved for ourselves are actually enjoying our life to the fullest. Our children are happy, so we are happy. In our old age we do not have much to worry about.
We feel very sorry for many parents, who almost at our age are just cannot feel happy. Many of these parents enjoyed much when they were young and found very little time for their children. You had party, Blockbusters to watch and most particularly you had the Ekta Kapoor’s vulgar stories to get glued on. You thought, just sending them to mushrooming English medium schools, setting them for rat race to succeed but not sitting with them for a minute to show the proper way how to succeed will do the miracle. You know, parenting process has no shortcut easy way. You cannot just remain busy with your own world and just throw some currency notes in front of them and feel that your children are happy and growing great.
You yourself never tried to learn your own age old culture and history of your own nation and so never thought that your children should also need to know that. What is happening with them???? Much money that you have earned and saved for them, with that most of you have created some Frankenstein, who not only going to dogs but also are sending our motherland into dogs.
Yes, now when you are already at my age, you are realising that your children are not happy and when your own children are not happy how can you be happy? I can see that you do not sleep at night, have Diabetes and Hypertension, much mental stress that is killing you. You are worried about that one of your child married to someone that really do not make you happy, one of your child is actually drug addict, one has gotten involved with wrong company and you are much worried with all that.
You never learned anything from what Alexander asked you to learn. He conquered almost one sixth of the world territory, enjoyed his life to the fullest but when he died at a very young age, he showed his empty hand to his friends just to tell the world that he died an unhappy soul.
Well, I only can pity you. You never thought what your child need and how he/she can be really happy because you were busy looking for own enjoyment and failed to perform your duty. God gave you the children you wanted but you defaulted from your duty to God. You must be unhappy, Sorry, some of my brothers and sisters.--- Yours truly..........Dr.M.K.Debnath